Pythian Games

by Kerry Vincent (c) 2003

If I had another 9 lives to live….

I’d eat more kitty treats and roll in more catnip;

I’d hide under more beds and shred more lace curtains.

I’d take more naps and bask in more sunbeams;

I’d chase more dust bunnies and eat breakfast twice.

I’d wake my human earlier each day

And look betrayed when we arrive at the vet’s.

I’d glare at more toddlers and swat at more dogs

So everyone would know I rule my home.

If I had another 9 lives to live

I would demand more petting,

Enjoy more ear and chin scratches,

Even roll on my back for more belly rubs.

I would shed more hair on the clean laundry

To freshly mark my territory.

I would grace more laps, pillows, and beds.

I would never let another day go by

Without a good, long, loud, deep

Puuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

When I am an old cat…

I shall eat only salmon mousse

And cough up hairballs in front of guests.

I shall bathe before the company

And lick between my toes while they watch.

I shall run when they try to pet me

And miss the litter box on purpose

When my human comes home late.

I shall refuse to eat dry kibbles

And hold out for canned fish

So I can whisker-kiss with tuna breath.

I shall look offended when pushed off

Of paperwork or my favorite chair,

And I will ignore being scolded

For leaving tongue grooves in the butter.

But for now I must not dig in house plants

And knock down knick-knacks too often.

I must not nip the children too hard

Or growl too much at the vet.

I must be purr-fect and pretty

And always adorable.

Still every now and then

I must hiss at the dog

And hide when I am called

And spit out my medicine

And act bored with my kitty toys

So my human will not be too surprised

When I become an old and finicky cat.

By Kerry Vincent © 2003