On The Third Day
by
It started snowing here , just north of Seattle, Washington on Friday so when I sat down to write today I thought maybe I’d revisit a story I wrote back in December.
It fits.
Enjoy!
amm
On the Third Day
We Toss Out The Left Overs
A few years ago my bus got caught in a snow storm and the going was slow.
S-L-O-W
So me and my friends told jokes, we told stories, we ate the Christmas Candy and food some of us had brought home from work parties that day.
Somebody busted into the wine bottle I had in my backpack (a gift from an oh-so generous Secret Santa) and someone else made a game out of the five of us drinking it without the other passengers catching on.
Oh Sure.
Nobody did.
Anyway.
Seeing that the other passengers were nervous about being stranded on the freeway and were openly worried about having to walk home or other such real and uncomfortable options me and my friends decided to cheer everybody up by telling stories at the top of our lungs
- about -
THAT TIME WE GOT STUCK ON THE BUS
The worst time was when there was a shooting, the gunman was loose on I-5 or was near it ( I forget the particulars ) so law enforcement shut the freeway down.
It was warm that day.
One of my bus friends decided after an hour or so to start talking about lakes and oceans and water fountains and Italian Sodas.
By the time he was done- (we remembered with hysterics) half the bus had to go to the bathroom, and we bet that the other half would have drank it.
AND THEN THERE WAS THAT OTHER TIME
The bus broke down and they promised that another bus was going to stop and get us…of course it didn’t and we watched it speed on by- but hurray! There was a second bus that came right up behind it about 15 minutes later and we thought it was going to pull in front of us so we could all get on.
Instead it stopped right along side of our bus.
I could see what was happening.
My brain locked.
” No.” I started to pound on the window like that kid in the horror film” Audrey Rose ” and I start yelling over and over ” No! For the love of God No!”
What is it? Everyone is asking me.
” It’s broken down…our rescue bus is BROKEN DOWN!”
AND WHAT ABOUT THAT TIME
We were stuck on the freeway because the Driver had called in and requested that someone come out and put chains on the bus because when the pavement is black and twinkling and big fluffy flakes are starting to fall, it’s safe to say that unless you’re a Polar Bear you probably shouldn’t be out there driving around without a little traction.
So thinking that no one was really listening except for my usual bus pals I told the story about that time me my friends and sneaked into this graveyard and built a massive snow fort and snow-people all around the grounds and how we even decorated one of the trees and how we later called the Funeral Home and blamed the entire mess on the college students who thought it was cool to hold seances and burn black candles on the headstones and things like that.
” Wow, you and your friends were evil little kids ” someone told me
and I said
” You know, like we did that two weeks ago. “
Heather Blakey
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Don’t get me started A.M. I will start recanting about being locked inside a train on a station in Italy, or wax lyrical about the time the train from Rome to Veletre broke down five kilometres out of Rome and we had to get back to our car at the station at Veletre. These two tales ended well but include lots of gestures, coincidences and a resolution not to travel on trains in Italy.
I was on the Metrorail once when it broke down between stops. Unfortunately, there was no one on the car who was the least bit funny or had any liquor.
Except for the homeless guy who snuck on the train, but he wasn’t going to share his stuff.
Heather…o come one, do tell Heather.
It’s true comedy is tragedy plus time.
L.
Homeless people are selfish I AM JUST KIDDING I AM JUST KIDDING…!!!!!!!!!!!!!SO PLEASE DON’T SEND ME HATE MAIL
AMM
So–we have another can’t wait for yet another version, Anita Marie: Like the time my family got to Canne just in time to find the ferry from Plymouth steaming back across the Channel–I got to ride to the Port of South Hampton all by myself with the train full of kids going back to London after one of those big remedial camp-outs on the Isle of Wight, summer in the country for slum kids–Can you imagine a train filled with teenagers just loosed from custody? I know how the fellow passengers feel on your bus(
Fran
or that time we were driving through the Arizona desert and blew a tire & a cop offered help but my then-husband told him to go on and then we discovered we didn’t have a jack - which would have been OK except my daughter was only 4 months old and it was 100 degrees outside and I had to make a tent for shade by throwing her baby blanket over a barbed wire fence…
…and then this bus from Seattle came by, full of drunken morticians on a field trip…
AM, I am not going to send you any hate mail; however, there is a dude on the green line who is asking about you…………..
Fun stories from everyone. We’ve been lucky enough not to have had too many adventures of this sort - knocking on wood here!
Hahahaha, wonderful —- if I ever, ever get stuck on a bus I want it to be with you and your friends…great tales ;O).